4.29.2011

Fear has no place in Our Hearts

Three Years...
Three years ago, our world was turned upside down.

I remember my parents calling my sister and I
Asking us to come over to their house, which normally wouldn't be a big deal
But it was after they were supposed to get the results
They asked both of us to leave work
I knew, what I had prayed for- didn't happen

We walked through the door
Mom and Dad sitting on the edge of the couch,
They stood up to hug us
Which normally wouldn't be a big deal
But there was something different
Everything felt much more delicate

There are just a few words that actually make it through my sobs.
Positive.
Maligant.
We will fight this.
Tears. Tears. Tears. and more Tears.
Breast Cancer.
Tears. Tears. Tears. and more Tears.
Fear has no place in our Hearts.
The Lord is working through us
Tears. Tears. Tears. and more Tears.

That moment, everything surged into perspective.
I remember calling my girlfriend Karalyn
I didn't have to say more than
I need to get my tattoo now
She knew exactly what I meant.
*I never did get the tattoo, granting Momma's wishes*

At that moment, I knew everything was about to change
My Momma and I would just sit on the couch and cry together
We researched. She researched. I cried.
When there is a threat to take away your best friend
There is no much more I could do but cry, and pray.

This experience, I would never wish upon any family
But the saddness is, it affects almost every family in some way
Our family chose to be better because of it
My mom sent out encouraging emails
Tracking her progress, with a sense of ease, strength and confidence
She was still our rock.

Fear has no place in our Hearts.

I became an emergency contact on my Momma's medical records
My dad was there, every.step.of.the.way.
He took her shopping for wigs.
Shaved her cute little cue ball head
Held her. Held all of us.
We went to every chemo treatment
He went to every doctors appointment.

This diagnosis brought our family closer together
And we were close before it happened
There was a reason that our family was going through this
And we were not going to let it be another bad statistic
.
I decided to walk in the Susan G. Komen 3 Day
You walk "60" miles in 3 days
Side note: technically the trail is about 20 miles a day, but you literally walk from 5 am Friday morning to 5 pm Sunday- so it adds up to being more than 60 miles.
I asked my friend Karalyn if she wanted to join
The next day she showed up with her tennis shoes on
and my very own pink camelbak
I knew we were doing this

Soon, my brother joined in
and then my dad
and then, my mom...
She didn't want to feel left out

So two weeks after finishing her last chemo
After having a double mastectomy, months prior
Our family walked over 60 miles in honor of the fight our Momma was fighting
It was definitely one of those experiences in life you don't forget

Sleeping in pink tents
Walking. Walking. and more Walking.
Hearing every word for "boob"- and its not weird or inappropriate
People cheering you on.
Tears. Happy Tears. Sad Tears.
Feeling accomplished to walk every step, next to Our Survivor.


Friends there to cheer us along

"I'm a Boob Man"- thats what his sign said

We Made It! The whole way!

We did the walk in San Diego. Figured if we are walking 60 miles, we might as well get a vacation from it!

Our Sign on our Tent to Thank all the people who donated!

The last years have come and gone
Most of the time, I don't think back on that time
I know it happened, but its gone
Fear has no place in our Hearts.

Thank you Momma for your fight
Thank you Jesus for letting us keep her here with us.
She needs to be here. for a very long time. please!
LYB, Bif. <3

2 comments:

  1. Thank goodness for answered prayers!
    <3

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well, I just read your blog, Bif, and I guess I will be headin to the shower.......again!! Thank you for your beautiful words, but most of all, for your love and support and for being such a help to Daddy and I both thru our journey with Breast Cancer! The Lord carried us when we couldn't carry ourselves and I pray that somewhere, someplace, someone was encouraged by our struggle!!! Love you to the moon and back! So proud of you!! You made such a difference in the journey and I will never forget that!!! <3 Dolly Momma

    ReplyDelete

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