I have been trying to find the time to sit down, and write these words
I had been struggling emotionally lately and I just couldn't figure out what was causing it...

In this process of trying to be the best possible version of myself,
One thing I have to do is be completely honest with myself.
But not ask myself questions that will never be answered...
What if I had done this differently?
What if this hadn't happened, where would I be now?
What if, What if, What if...

Sometimes you just need some tough love.
The "What ifs" don't matter, but this IS what happened...
But the next questions is Why do I feel the way I do?

Then I figured it out..

I was scared. scared shitless (sorry momma)
I was scared of change
I was scared of starting over
I was scared of being vulnerable
I was scared of not knowing what the future holds
I was scared of failing... again... 
I was scared of won't live to my full potential
I was scared of the unknown
I was scared of constant comparison

I was scared

Not that I won't have moments of fear
about all, or one of these things again.
Because I am sure I will...
I just have to remember

"Fear has no place in my heart"

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