Expectations

I am sure, or at least I hope, I am not the only one in this world that has expectations. I wake up every morning with preconceived expectations of how my day will be, what traffic will be like and what conversations I will have with certain people. I have expectations of how my family, friends and strangers will act, react and be. The problem with these expectations is that they are often nothing like what "real" life is.

I am starting to feel that these expectations I have of people are just a way to disappoint myself, and prove that humans are selfish by nature and there is nothing you can do. Why is it that when someone does something that is not what you expected, you are the one hurt or disappointed?! I have expectations of how my friends should be regardless of who they are dating, how busy their schedule is or what their life has thrown their way because I have those same expectations for myself under the same circumstances. Be a friend, through and through. Its sad to be on the two way street, meeting halfway in the middle with no one following through on the other side.

I am sensitive, there is nothing I can do to change that, I have tried, if I could I would but, I can't! I take things to heart, I wear my heart on my sleeve, I expect good things from everyone in my life, I am not perfect, I don't expect a hell of a lot (to be honest) but often my expectations are not reached.

How do you stop feeling disappointed, hurt, or used when the expectations you have for someone are not met by them, even if its without their knowledge? Its a path with no start or end, you go around and around trying to figure out how you can make these feelings go away because they are not worth it. There are so many more issues in the world besides a friend only needing you when you're convenient for them. There are so many more people suffering in the world besides a girl who is hurt by the lack of effort in a friendship. This is another reason I am selfish by nature, which I hate so much, I can't not feel these feelings when my expectations are not met because my hurt is greater than others to me. These expectations not met by others are nothing in the real world, but they are real to me...

The expectations I hold for today are the same as yesterday and the same as tomorrow.